Review: Jason Aldean - Old Boots, New Dirt
By Jordan Matthiass, Contributor
[Broken Bow; 2014]
Rating: 1/10
Key Track: “Sweet Little Something”
“Backpfeifengesicht” is a German word that roughly translates to “face begging to be slapped.” From first look at the album’s cover, it’s easy to feel that Jason Aldean rocks a textbook Backpfeifengesicht. As one gets further into the album and comes to know this awful human’s awful musical style and his even-more-awful objectification of women, his Backpfeifengesicht becomes a bit more than that: an icon representing everything wrong with country music.
Don’t get me wrong, preconceived notions and judging albums by their covers are two things that should typically be avoided; however, Old Boots, New Dirt practically begs for this. The cover is the worst thing to ever happen. That Backpfeifengesicht. Modern country is also the worst thing to ever happen. It’s a breeding ground for the politically and socially backward to spew regressionist ideals and hate, all over the worst-sounding instrumentation ever to exist. This review was not undertaken with high hopes, but the actual depths to which this piece of dirt (get it?) sank was almost unbelievable.
Let’s take one second to look at Aldean’s history. In 2005, Jason Aldine Williams ditched his birth name to strike fame as Jason Aldean, a character created by Broken Bow Records. Jason Aldean has, in the time since 2005, released six studio albums and 21 singles. Aldean falls squarely into the category of “corporate drone,” as he neither writes nor does much instrumental work for “his” music. The character of Aldean was born to top charts and with five platinum albums and 12 chart-topping singles, this persona has fulfilled its goals.
Simply put, this man, his music and the genre to which it belongs should be avoided at all cost. As soon as the first lines of “Just Gettin’ Started” were sung, I selected Spotify’s “Private Session” option, hoping to shield my friends from the shame of having to see what I was putting myself through.
Old Boots, New Dirt coasts on ingenuine songwriting and instrumentation that doesn’t sound even the least bit “country.” Aldean, or rather, Aldean’s agents, should think about the fact that throwing a banjo over boring, distortion-heavy early 2000s guitar rock does not a country album make. Whatever happened to the classic image of a lone performer singing his heart out over the twang of a handcrafted steel string?
Old Boots’ brash disrespect for its mother genre deepens in “Show You Off,” a track seemingly designed for the express purpose of making blood boil. There is, of course, the disgustingly generic scoring pulled directly from a beer commercial, but also another signpost of modern country: blatant misogyny.
“I just want to show you off / Drive 'em all crazy / Watch all the boys hate me / Is that so wrong?” Yes, Aldean. It is. Women are not trophies.
This atmosphere of sexism and disrespect carries through the rest of the album, making it an incredibly uncomfortable listen. The worst track--of many terrible tracks--is easily “Sweet Little Something.” If the title makes you want to gag, the baby’s-first-keyboard-riff played on repeat over verses like, “I need a sweet little somethin' like you got / Standing there red hot, tied up little tank top / Looking like you must be straight out of the country / Honey, what I wouldn't do for a sweet little somethin' like you,” will put you all the way over.
Aldean, please stop. These abhorrent, invariably-three-minute-long microaggressions need to go, as do your writers. Old Boots, New Dirt has zero redeeming qualities. Zero.
